Tip—It’s a lot more pleasant to teach your children to play together than it is to discipline them for fighting.

It’s still winter and the kids are still inside most of the time. If you’re getting tired of policing conflicts between your older child and his or her toddler sibling, then consider deliberately teaching the older one fun things to play with the toddler. Karen Hendrickson, parent educator and author of Baby and I Can Play and Fun with Toddlers, notes that children will need help getting started with some play ideas. They will also need your ready praise when they try those ideas on their own. Be sensitive to common, yet valid complaints like “He’s always wants the toy I have” or “She never leaves me alone” or “He messes up my stuff.” Teach your child firm, yet gentle, responses to these typical toddler behaviors.

Tools—Hendrickson offers a plethora of play ideas in her book—most of them quite easy to implement at home.

• Make a parade. Toddlers like to march so parades are especially fun for them. Get out any toy instruments you already have or fashion a few on your own (an oatmeal box drum, a rattle, pots and pans, etc.) Put on the marching music and let them go. Remind your older child to let the younger one lead sometimes.

  

• Block play. Tell your child that toddlers adore knocking things down and to expect it. If he wants to build houses or other things he wants to keep up, he should do those on a table or at another time with an older friend. Hendrickson recommends towers for knocking down or building train tracks and then running toy trains on them together.

• Circle games. Ring-Around-the-Rosy or Motor Boat are classic, toddler-approved circle games. A fun variation on Motor Boat is to run in circles and say, “fast, fast, fast” or “slow, slow, slow.”

• Read a book together. You don’t need to read words to enjoy a book together. Your older child can flip through board books with the toddler and point out pictures or even tell his own story about them. If it’s a sturdy one, a lift-the-flap book is also fun for them to share.

You’ll find more practical tips you can use right now in Baby and I Can Play and Fun with Toddlers by Karen Hendrickson.

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