Tip—Playing games in the car together can help foster cooperation—all family members working together toward a common goal, instead of competing as loners.

It’s bound to happen—you’ll be trapped in the car with one or more children and everyone will be bored. Instead of waiting for a squabble to break out, teach your children “road games” that help to pass the time and stretch their minds in new ways. Laurie Simons, therapist and author of Taking “No” for an Answer and Other Skills Children Need, points out that playing such games builds cooperation among family members. She says that practicing this skill means working together with all ages—family members who have different levels of skill or ability or different points of view. Further, playing games together allows a feeling of community to develop.

Tools—Start off with Simons’ game called Rag Doll to get everyone relaxed and ready to play.

• Rag Doll—Everyone can play this, except for the driver, who could give the instructions.

  Driver: “Let’s do the calming countdown exercise. Raise both arms straight up over your head. Count with me slowly backwards from ten to one. Lower your arms slowly forward as we count, until they are relaxed and resting on your knees as we reach the number one.”

  Start counting, choosing the pace for the children to follow. Slowly lower arms to knees. Have the children check each other’s arms to see if they are really relaxed. Lift a wrist gently and let it drop back to the person’s lap.



• The Alphabet Game—This is a classic game where you look as a team for letters on roadside signs or license plates. Start with A and go all the way to Z. If it’s a letter on a sign, the word must begin with the letter in question, for example, “S” could be found on a “Stop” sign, but not “T.” Take turns looking for letters and let older children help the younger ones. Change the rules, if you like. For example, my kids decided that Q and X are so hard to find, they may occur anywhere in a word, not just at the beginning.

• The Name Game—This is another alphabet game that can be done with names, fruits and vegetables, Disney characters, or just about any category you like. First you decide if you are going to use male or female names. Then everyone must name a man’s name beginning with the letter A, then B, then C, and so on. Each round uses a different letter. Make it cooperative—if someone cannot think of a female name beginning with the letter H, give clues: “Think of one of your aunts.”

• Make Up Songs—Using common tunes, make up new words. The classic example of this is: “Jingle Bells, Batman smells. . .” Recently in the car, my daughter made up new jingles to this tune, using Gilligan’s Island and A Christmas Story characters. Making up new songs is more fun and easier if everyone helps out.

You’ll find more practical tips you can use right now in Taking “No” for an Answer and Other Skills Children Need by Laurie Simons, M.A.

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